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　　"Three children" and "women" are all hot words at the two sessions this year.

When these two hot words encounter one, women in the "three children" family are a group worthy of attention.After giving birth to multiple children, caught the house of housework, can my mother still have her own career and life?Women have the right to have their own life representatives of the National People’s Congress and researcher at the Shanghai Academy of Social Sciences. This year, it brought "suggestions on improving the supporting system to promote the implementation of the" three children "policies."It is mentioned that the main factors affecting the implementation of the "three children" policies are: the changes in young people’s marriage and childbirth, the higher proportion of the two employees’ families, the fierce competition in the workplace, and the high cost of children, including high living costs, including house prices.Zhang Zhao’an admits that due to the incomplete infant care system, many parents of children are difficult to balance the relationship between families and work.In real society, most women will be more or less affected after giving birth, and even have to start from scratch.

Therefore, in view of the current employment situation and the reality of competition in the workplace, some women dare not adventure again, and some families have paid forward to fertility two children and three children. The full -time consultant room of Peking University Student Mental Health Education and Consultation Center has long been committed to the research of many children’s families. She pointed out that women must first believe that while raising multiple children, they have the right, worthy, and can have their own life. "Women’s beliefs at the cognitive level are important, which is equivalent to a role positioning. With a clear and clear positioning, we can then talk about methods.

"There is also a point of view in the society." The previous generation of mothers gave birth to so many children, and they did not live well. "Fang Chao pointed out that the previous generation was not really without this problem, but that they did not feel that they lost themselves. "The family model of the previous generation or earlier was mostly in the male lead and the female owner. Women dedicated themselves in their families and agreed with this role. But today’s women have the demands of self -development, and in reality, girls have not inferior to boys from school. "Be a better mother, the premise is to be a better self.

Fang Chao feels that women should not want to be a "perfect mother" and be a "good enough" mother.

"’Perfect Mom’ is the needs of a mother, not the needs of children. Children in many children’s families, in more complicated relationships, can learn more cooperation, more competition, and deal with their emotions. Mom You can relax and believe in your child’s potential.

"Fang Chao’s friends had 3 children. On one occasion, she took the children alone on the street.

Some people say, "Oh my god, isn’t you dangerous to cross the road with 3 children?" The mother said disdain. "Do you think my child can even cross the road?" A family sometimes looks like a company room. Super said that the time and energy to raise multiple children must be greater than only one child, and some of them belong to "force majeure", but a family sometimes looks like a company, which needs to be managed, and some links have room for optimization. Moreover, all family members must participate in the "project" of raising children together. In Fang Chao’s home, a family meeting will be held every week to participate in all members.

The content of the meeting includes what everyone has done in the past week, what is the mood, what progress, what difficulties, whether it is necessary to help, they will also mention opinions, criticize and criticize themselves. The Internet Q & A community knows that there is a question on the Internet, "What is the daily life of people with Sanwa in the family?" It is not difficult to see that the questioner actually has various "chicken flying dog jump" presets. Under this question, the answer of the netizen Carrie seems unique: the housework is no longer meticulous, and the machine can be used with machines.

For lunch, a child changes the pattern every day, and the three children come to each person a sandwich every day. What, one is not enough, then two. The refrigerator must be large, and I want to add a freezer, which is always full. No one is noisy, and she only entangle her mother and annoyed; 3 children are noisy every day, and their heads are painful; but 3 babies can hold their relatives, and 3 babies say to me. Mom wishes you a one tonight. How beautiful this is a dream! The netizen "Kelly Chicken" has 3 children, 2 years old, 3 years, and 5 years old.

She drew a schedule from 6 am to 10 o’clock in the evening, accurate to half an hour. The time management ability was like professional managers.

She said: "Parents of many children family must have superb disciplinary skills, otherwise the adults are tired and the children are suffering." These answers have spitting, methods, and more love. Fang Chao said: "Parents are like leaders. They can formulate the goals of the family and let all family members work in one direction; they can ask questions, analyze, solve problems, and let their children realize self -management under management and constraints.

"Dad’s awareness of responsibility is very important to raise children, especially for the first three years to involve a lot of time and energy. Although there may be the help of the elderly on both sides, Fang Chao does not agree with" raising "from a professional perspective.

"Parents’ characters and functions are irreplaceable by the previous generation.

When the opinions are inconsistent, listen to your parents.

"It is by no means a woman who is a woman. It is the choice and decision of both husbands and wives. Since you choose more children, you must find a way to face it together.

At this time, the awareness and ability of the husband, the father, the dad seemed particularly important. Fang Chao pointed out that when gender characters and gender division of labor have greater elasticity. Only when both husband and wife agree, the family’s system and structure can become more flexible. "Raising children must be involved in father, including housework and family management.

"Fang Chao said," The child is fighting, and the father needs to mediate; the mother is depressed, and the father needs to support and accompany him.

"Zhang Zhao’an suggested that for families with more children, you can appropriately extend the time of maternity leave and the man’s accompanying holiday; you can also implement the elastic maternity leave system, and the husband’s accompanying leave and his wife’s maternity leave and maternity leave will be added. How to allocate time between individuals and families, enterprises and society should also reduce the burden of childcare economy for young people and solve their worries. From the corporate level, Zhang Zhansan suggested to promote the professional friendly selection policy of the three -child mother. Employment preferential policies will give certain tax and fees to companies that recruit three -child mothers; encourage companies to accept the three -child mother’s childcare or flexible working system during their childcare, and encourage full -time mothers to accept fragmented work during the parenting stage.

　　From the social level, all kinds of supporting facilities should keep up in time, especially the improvement of infant care services and education systems.

Zhang Zhao’an suggested that through the reconstruction and expansion of kindergartens, increase the proportion of public kindergartens, vigorously encourage and support employers and social forces, participate in the establishment of nursery service institutions, vigorously improve the entry rate, and solve the "boss difficult" problem of "who will bring children" Essence